


Charlie's Yard

by Valkrist (Anouk_Tyrell)



Category: Peaky Blinders (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Gen, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-12
Updated: 2020-12-12
Packaged: 2021-03-11 02:22:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,825
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28027731
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Anouk_Tyrell/pseuds/Valkrist
Summary: Tommy should’ve seen it coming, finding a way to prevent things from happening, but now he couldn’t stop it anymore - he had to finish what he had started.It was easy to blame it all on Mosley, saying that he was a bad man Tommy had to defeat. A man he could defeat, actually, despite the problems cropping up. It all seemed so easy when he looked at him, seeing this dark soul, a confidence he would have to fight against. Simply doing something good, coming up with a perfect plan to bring him down, every detail there to make Tommy succeed.
Relationships: Charlie Shelby & Ruby Shelby & Barney Thompson, Charlie Shelby & Ruby Shelby & Tommy Shelby, Tommy Shelby/Barney Thompson
Kudos: 2





	Charlie's Yard

**Author's Note:**

> Hello my friends!
> 
> Somehow I didn't include Ruby and Charlie for a rather long time now, so I decided to look how they could create different scenarios. That's what happened :)
> 
> Enjoy!

Tommy should’ve seen it coming, finding a way to prevent things from happening, but now he couldn’t stop it anymore - he had to finish what he had started.

It was easy to blame it all on Mosley, saying that he was a bad man Tommy had to defeat. A man he could defeat, actually, despite the problems cropping up. It all seemed so easy when he looked at him, seeing this dark soul, a confidence he would have to fight against. Simply doing something good, coming up with a perfect plan to bring him down, every detail there to make Tommy succeed.

But maybe it had been a horrible idea, after all, hiding Barney in Charlie’s Yard and not looking for an even safer place. Tommy had relied on the first idea popping into his head and now he had to live with the consequences. Had to pay for thinking that this place was unimportant, that Uncle Charlie or someone else would always be there, making sure that everything was alright.

Should’ve known that sooner or later people would find out, somehow see this man who could still be innocent as a young boy, but he hadn’t expected that it would be Charlie and Ruby whom he would meet when entering the stables. Even if it made sense, they were so good at sneaking around without being noticed - and sometimes they wouldn’t even need it, looking cute and wrapping people around their tiny little fingers.

Tommy hadn’t thought that he would ever think it, but it nearly broke his heart to see them that happy. The sight was too endearing, Charlie and Ruby sitting next to Barney, listening to him as he told them something that seemed to be a funny story. There could be no other reason for their laughter, for this smiles Tommy only saw so terribly rarely. How could he do this, how?

For a second there was fear in Barney’s eyes, as if Tommy had caught him doing something bad, but it vanished as Tommy got closer, leaning against the wall next to them till the kids made more space for him to sit down, too. He was surprised that they didn’t ask questions, even if Barney surely hadn’t told them where he had been this last ten years. Maybe they had forgotten about it as they were just listening to him, Charlie laughing and Ruby leaning against Barney’s arm.

Tommy made sure that they wouldn’t tell the others about Barney, coming up with a lovely story, but they still knew now, they knew.

***

"They’re lovely, aren’t they?“ Barney looked so happy as he mentioned the kids, it reminded Tommy of the moment when he had promised to break him out of the asylum. It was like a spark of hope, as if Ruby and Charlie made him feel even more alive, as if they had already become a kind of family for him. Maybe they had, considering how he had had to live without loving people before. Did it mean the he would keep growing attached to people way too fast?

"You’re a lucky man, Tom, a lucky one.“ If he only knew … nothing was as easy as it seemed to be. Tommy felt like he would never have enough time for the kids, never give them all this love they deserved. Maybe they even preferred Barney now, he had time for them and made them feel good, at least. Was he himself a bad father now? Bad because he wanted to make the world a better place for them? But maybe he shouldn’t complain, not when Barney sounded so melancholic, probably sad because he would never have this family luck.

Tommy took Barney’s hand into his own. He still wore the shooting gloves, probably like a habit from back then - or maybe he just wanted to feel like the boy he had been ten years ago, the boy who didn’t exist anymore, the boy from the war that had made them all smile. But Tommy couldn’t tell him, could he? Couldn’t destroy this illusion, if it existed. He simply brought his fingers to the glove fastener, opening it to feel the hand without this barrier between them.

It was warm, only some callouses on the soft skin of palm and back, and somehow it felt good. So much better than the glove that was now laying next to them, so much more reassuring. Barney seemed to feel the same, judging from the way his fingers moved till their fingers were intertwined.

Tommy brought the hand to his lips, pressed a kiss to Barney’s knuckles. Normally it would’ve been a gesture for the ladies, something to make them blush and feel successful, but with Barney it all didn’t matter. Tommy didn’t care that he was a man, that some people would call it unnatural. Barney’s smile was way too beautiful, distracted him from all bad thoughts, and Barney blushing right up to the ears made Tommy chuckle.

He was a beautiful man, after all, someone who made Tommy feel good and didn’t judge.

***

Sometimes when he felt Barney’s hands folded in his neck Tommy didn’t know if he was doing the right thing. Gentle fingers, pulling him closer and massaging his scalp, going back to his jaw. Barney’s hands seemed to be everywhere: Cradling Tommy’s face, stroking his upper arms - whispers like _God, you’re so strong_ in between - and fumbling with the buttons of his waistcoat.

He did it all with the patience of a sniper, one garment after another falling to the floor before there were hands discovering Tommy’s chest. Barney was worshiping him, wasn’t he? It felt like nothing less when his fingertips touched skin, tracing the tattoos, and when there suddenly were this soft lips wandering over Tommy’s chest, occasionally sucking. _You still remember, don’t you? It’s beautiful,_ you _are beautiful._ Wouldn’t even leave marks, Tommy knew that, but somehow he even started to wish that Barney actually would, sometimes. People would know that they belonged together, that they would protect each other. Oh, Barney could definitely protect him, just give him a rifle, and he could do the same for him.

But he couldn’t do this to Lizzie, couldn’t do this to Barney, eh? It would be too much of a risk, a danger they didn’t need. Not worth it as long as they had the possibility to keep it a clandestine thing, a pure affair. Barney didn’t complain, he himself didn’t complain, Lizzie didn’t know. No heart to be broken when they all lay down to sleep, feeling as save as possible, having some plans for the future.

***

It became a more frequent thing, the kids showing up sometimes. Tommy could’ve simply stopped taking them with him when he went to Small Heath, but wouldn’t it have been suspicious to leave them at Arrow House the whole time? They deserved to have some fun, even if this fun was something Tommy himself didn’t want. They deserved to be happy, even if this happiness had something to do with Barney and this good relationship he had with the kids.

Even if Barney had spent so many days locked away, he still seemed to remember some things - or maybe he just came up with some games spontaneously, Tommy couldn’t say. He just knew that Charlie and Ruby grew attached to Barney the same way he did, smiling when he hid his face behind the hands and showed it again, always another funny expression. It was terribly childish, of course, but wasn’t it worth it when the kids were so happy?

Barney could sing, too. Tommy hadn’t known, drunken singing only a faint memory from war, he could barely remember the voices. But what he heard now as he came in was something soothing and calming, it lulled him like Barney’s arms did when he wrapped them around Tommy. This man was born to have kids, even if faith seemed to have another opinion on it. He knew how to make them feel beloved, how to calm them down, Tommy could learn enough simply by looking at him.

Sometimes it was hard for Tommy to hold back a gasp. On dark evenings Barney kept being too hard on himself, letting Tommy know how he felt. He thought that he didn’t give Charlie and Ruby enough, that he should give them some real presents, not only play and sing. How could Tommy convince him, show him that this things weren’t silly and so much better than his own methods?

Tommy would’ve felt way worse if he didn’t know why he was the man he was, that he didn’t have enough time for his kids because it was the business that kept them alive, it was business that gave them the money they needed for a better life. They deserved so much more than Tommy had had at their age.

In the end the best thing Tommy could do was to hug Barney, whispering that he did more than enough into his ear, that they both did their bit to make Ruby and Charlie happier than ever. Ruby wasn’t afraid of Tommy anymore, nor did she hate him, so she would accept presents the same way Charlie did. Barney could feel responsible for the emotional part, if he wanted to. The thought itself seemed to keep him alive. Tommy realized that this was why he didn’t want to die. Barney wanted to feel needed and beloved, helping Tommy and the kids was perfect to make him feel good.

Tommy knew how cruel he could be, that he made Charlie and Ruby see things others never even found out about - they should have a rather innocent world for some years before blood and booze entered their lives. But it was necessary, and maybe Barney would teach him some things he could still keep using later on, when Barney wouldn’t be there for the family anymore, back in the asylum.

***

The kids nearly caught them doing it one day.

Tommy stopped moving as he heard their voices, laughter from outside mixing up with Barney’s gasps and his own quiet moans, innocence getting closer to forbidden things. It was a lovely coincidence that they had locked the door - something they often didn’t think about - giving themselves some extra seconds. They needed it, this closeness, at least sometimes, and it was easy to say that they just had important things to discuss, not having to admit what actually happened.

People didn’t need to know what was happening, didn’t need to know that Tommy let himself go sometimes, that this time it was Barney carefully pulling out of him. Tommy couldn’t explain how it had happened again, why he had given up some control, but maybe he could blame it on this tenderness, so fragile in contrast to the rough world outside of these for walls. When he thought about it, he realized that there were such lovely things happening there, smiling kids and beautiful words.

One last wet kiss on Barney’s lips before he stood up, already pulling his pants up. The kids had chosen a horrible moment to look after them, but could he blame them for it? They didn’t know, only wanted to make all the people they cared about happy. Sometimes Tommy admired them for this quality, for bringing joy with them wherever they went, no matter how hard life was.

Tommy was the one who went to the door, giving Barney some extra seconds to put himself into his trousers, trying to look less debauched again. He was better at it than Tommy had expected, still so much efficiency in his movements. It was always good to see that some things would never change, that they were both good at racing against time, in a way. One last check, everything looking normal again, before Tommy opened the door.

“There you are!“

***

Tommy could hear the angelic voice before he went inside. It surprised himself that he called it angelic in his head, but it was soothing, like a wonderful revelation. He still couldn’t believe that Barney sang that well, that he still knew melodies and didn’t feel insecure. Had been pretty shy during war, at least in comparison to many others. Everything worked with the help of booze, of course, but this time there was no bottle around to explain it.

He tried to be as quiet as he could as he opened the door. Wanted to listen to Barney a little bit longer, not scaring him or making him feel uncomfortable. A decision he didn’t regret as he saw the whole picture. Barney was the only one awake and slowly stopped singing as he noticed Tommy, Charlie leaning on him with his eyes closed and snoozing. Same went for Ruby who snuggled up to her brother, probably dreaming of something beautiful.

“Didn’t know songs could be so powerful.“ It was only a whisper, but Tommy heard it. This man was unbelievable, didn’t realize how much people liked him, but kept being so genuine and friendly. “And they fell asleep?“ Barney nodded. Tommy sat down next to Ruby. Couldn’t believe his eyes anymore, didn’t even know if he should keep trying. Did it make sense, having another thing to keep his head occupied with?

“Unbelievable.“ Maybe it shouldn’t have happened, this kiss with the kids between them, but for one second Tommy let himself imagine that this was a kind of family he didn’t have to hide. He could feel Barney’s breath on his lips. _How would it be if he weren’t insane, could he have a fulfilled life too?_ Barney closed his eyes and so did Tommy. _Would Polly accept Barney if Tommy said how much he meant to him?_ They both knew what they were doing, responding to each other, Tommy tugging on Barney’s lower lip. _Was there a way to change all the bad things back, giving Barney a life he deserved, no matter if Tommy was a part of it or not?_

But now it was easier to push the thoughts aside, pretending that this kiss didn’t have to be a secret, that they all could be happy.

***

How could he ever explain it to them when Barney disappeared one day, going back to the asylum sooner or later? Tommy wasn’t sure if they would let go of him if he said that Barney simply had to leave them, without an explanation. They would still be coming back, hoping that he was there and Tommy had been wrong, after all. He couldn’t break their little hearts that way, even if it would still be better than the truth. They didn’t need to know what asylums were yet, didn’t need to know what could happen when Barney lost control.

Could he take such a responsibility, letting this man who meant so much to him go? It shouldn’t be such a problem, they had never promised each other anything - or well, maybe he couldn’t remember it because of post-coital endorphins. There had only been compliments, thinking about all this passionate things to say when being quite close was not an option. No broken hearts, it was better that way, even if it meant holding back some of the thoughts that didn’t need to be put into words.

Tommy didn’t know what to do, Barney’s arms around him sending beautiful shivers down his spine. He was still half naked, warm breaths against Tommy’s neck. Held him like a big stuffed toy he never wanted to let go of, like an anchor in this world. Barney trusted him, just wanted to have him close. It was about all this comfortable feelings, about saving each other, in a way.

It wasn’t as desperate as usual, quite the opposite, actually. They had nearly done it again, just following instincts, but Tommy had felt that something was different this time even before Barney had said it. _Maybe you just wanna stay? Easier to fall asleep that way._ And so they had left their shirts on the floor, not doing what they had wanted to do, Barney laying down behind Tommy and wrapping an arm around him. They had whispered funny things, only some kisses in between, Barney’s lips on Tommy’s shoulder before he had continued talking.

Tommy turned around, feeling like Barney’s grip on his waist tightened. Only a little bit, nothing that could hurt him, but for a second it was as if Barney was afraid to let him go. His eyes were still closed, but Tommy knew that he couldn’t be asleep, not when he leaned into Tommy’s touch that way and smiled even brighter, not when he intertwined their fingers. It felt like he could love Barney all his life now, beautifully natural, worth the risks. He leaned closer, his nose touching Barney’s as he rubbed them together, Barney chuckling before he opened his mouth.

“Give me a kiss, eh?“

**Author's Note:**

> Do you think Barney would've become a lovely father without the whole asylum storyline?
> 
> Tumblr: @valkrist


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